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I can’t make them care.  Actually, I can’t make them do anything.  I can’t make them be quiet, and I can’t make them do their work.  I certainly can’t make them care about math.

The best I can do is to motivate and inspire them.  And lately, I’ve been at a total loss as to how to do that.

I’ve got a frame on my desk that holds three pictures:  one with my sisters, one with my good friends from college, and one with one of my inspirations for this whole “teaching” gig.  Behind my desk, there’s a picture of the Longhorn Band.

My kids love to look at them, and ask me about them often.

About my sisters (who do share some resemblance to me, to be fair):

“Ooooh Miss!  Who are they?”

“Those are my sisters.”

“Yeah!  You all look the same!!  Do they live here?”

“No, they live in Cincinnati, where I grew up.”

“Oh!  Like California?”

“Not quite…”

About my friends:

“Who are these people?  Is that your dad??”

“No, not quite–they’re all my age.”

“Oh.”

“They’re all my friends.  This is when we were in college together.  He lives in Houston–he works for the mayor.  The other two are in law school now.  One is at Harvard, and the other is at Yale–”

“I know where that is!  That’s in Houston!”

“No, it’s–”

“Oh, I meant Yates.  Not Yale.”

“Yeah, Yale and Harvard are really good schools in the Northeast.”

“Yeah, they sound like pretty good colleges.”

And about the band:

“Oh Miss Garner!  Where are you?? [Searching…Searching…Landing on a guy with long hair] Oh!  Is this you?”

“Nope, that’s not me–that’s actually a guy.”

“BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! [Searching more…searching more…Landing on a girl who’s not me]  Oh!  Is this you??”

“No, that one of my good friends, though!  People say we look alike.  I’m over here–with the piccolos”

“But you aren’t wearing glasses!”

I love this job.

I have some totally adorable kids.  Let me tell you about them.

I’ve got two guys (G and J) who like to come to tutorials often.  The “tutorial” usually goes something like this:

Me:  Hi G, hi J–how are you guys today?

G:  Hey Miss, we’re good.  How are you?

Me:  I’m fine, thank you.  What can I help you with?
J:  Oh, nothing.

Me:  Nothing?  You’re in tutorials but you don’t have any questions?
J:  Yup, pretty much.

G:  Can we do board races?

So I give them a few problems to work out on the board and let them do their thing, and then we hang out for a bit and talk.  They’re hilariously goofy kids, and I think it’s adorable that they want to hang out with the math teacher.  I felt bad that I had to give them detentions last week, though, because they keep talking in class.  I’m not sure it was much of an inconvenience, though, since they were planning to stay after school with me anyway…

My third period class is easily my most challenging.  The mix of students usually prevents me from getting very much done.  I’ve got two girls, though, who sit in front and are very smart and are always trying to learn, even if everyone around them has given up (even me, some days).  When I asked them all to write me letters last Friday, one of them wrote me the best one of all:

4: A

2: Ms G

Hi Ms G.  I want to tell you thank you are such a great teacher.  I like your class and you a lot.  Maby I’ll come for tutorials some day next week to bring my 92% up to a 100%.  Hope you have a Great Day Ms!!!

It was folded like a middle school note and everything.

Fourth period (the lunch period) has good days and bad days.  For a while, I had two girls in there (B and J) who, as B’s mother phrased it, “make each other dumber when they’re together.”  B’s mom moved her schedule around so that they no longer have any classes together.  J is still in 4th period, but B is in another class.   Though B is still as flippant as ever–really, she hasn’t changed at all–J is making an honest effort to be a good student.  She only has lunch detention most days (not every day) and actively tries to pay attention (and get her classmates to pay attention) in class.

Lately, she’s been coming back to the room early from lunch to hang out with me and talk.  She tells me about her family and school and how she’s going to Mexico this summer (but only if she gets good grades).  She asks me about my sisters and going to UT and if anyone has ever tried to make me do drugs.  She asked me about my favorite (and least favorite) years that I was in school.  I’m usually listening to classical music during lunch, and sometimes leave it on while we talk.  Somehow, my musical tastes came up around some other students–one of them said “Oh, classical music is so boring!”  Her response?  “Actually, I think it’s kinda cool.”

I know that she’s trying to stay on the right track now, and I want to do everything I can to help her do that.

I had my students write letters to me on Friday.  Some of them are failing, and a lot just aren’t doing as well as they could be.  I offer tutorials just about every day before and after school, but the ones that need me most aren’t taking me up on the offer.  The grading period ends in a week, and a lot of them are in big trouble.  I made those who are failing (or failed the most recent test) write me a letter:

“Dear Ms. G,

I will come to tutorials on ____________ because I need help with ____________.

Thanks,

__________

I’m going to remind them of our tutorial sessions next week, and maybe they’ll actually come.  I’ve found, though, that whenever I make them write something, I get all sorts of hilarious responses.  Some of them are ridiculous, like the kid who says he’s “too busy” to come to tutorials because he “has things to do”:

Dear Ms. G,

I will come to tutorials on after Christmas break.

Or the one that is passing my class with flying colors:

Dear Ms G,

I will not come to ttutorials on none of the days because I need help with my dancing club.

Thanks sinceraly, A.

Or the one (well, one of many) who talks during class every single day:

Dear Ms. G,

I will come to tutorials on sometimes next week because I need help with everything you ever toght.

Thank, L.

Or the one that needs to check her schedule, apparently:

Dear Ms G,

I will come to tutorials on “I don’t know can I tell you when I know because right know Im not shure”

Thanks, S

I also have one coming on “Tursday”–I’m not sure if that means Tuesday or Thursday…it’s one letter away from each.

I’m glad they’ll actually come to tutorials.  I’m also glad that I’m not their English teacher.

I’m used to juggling a lot of things, but I’m not used to juggling so many things that are all so related and dependent on one another.

There are issues with grades–failing kids, missing assignments, grading and entering assignments, keeping up with tracking…
There are issues with behavior–rewarding the good, preventing the bad, dealing with attitudes and detentions and referrals and consequences…

There are the relationships–keeping up with the kids, calling all the parents, getting to know the colleagues, remembering to ask all the questions and get help when I need it…

And you can’t forget the classroom itself–implementing new procedures and systems, checking binders, keeping it tidy
Though I don’t feel that overwhelmed,  I’m continually amazed at how many things I can forget and remember and re-forget and re-remember in a single day.  It’s like I’m juggling, and I keep noticing a ball that rolled under a desk… Whoops!

My kids are ri.dic.u.lous.  RIDICULOUS.  Apparently, some of them are even budding romantics:
Beginning of 4th period:
S1:  Miss, is it going to rain today?

Me:  Um, I don’t know–it’s a good thing we’re inside, though.  Now get going on the daily math review.
S2:  I love the rain.

Me:  That’s great!  Now get to work on the daily math review!

S2 (continuing):  But I need a girl.

Me:  What??

S2:  Yeah, I need a girl, to sit with in the rain.  It’s so relaxing, and–

Me:  Daily math review.  Now.

I also love the conclusions that they jump to.  I told some of my classes that I wouldn’t have tutorials today because I had a meeting.  My favorite responses to “I have a meeting to–” (I could never finish that sentence…)

1. OoOOOOoOoOooh Miss has a DATE!!!
2. Are you getting FIRED?!
3. *GASP* Are you getting married??
4. You’re leaving us for another job?
5. Are you getting a raise??
6. Do you have a boyfriend?!  (And then:  Have you ever had a boyfriend??)

And, my all-time personal favorite:

YOU’RE PREGNANT!  (Immediately followed by another student:  OH GOD NO!!)

I would have gotten mad at the second student (is it really that terrible that I might reproduce?), except his response was about the same as mine, so…I let it slide.  But there may be another explanation–it was the same student who has had the following conversation with me:

S:  Hey, Miss, when are we going to hit up the clubs?

Me:  Excuse me??

S:  You and me, Miss–let’s go clubbing!!

Me:  Um, I don’t think so.

S:  Don’t you club, Miss?

Me:  Can you even get into clubs?

S:  Of COURSE I can, Miss!  I’m 14 now!!  Let’s go clubbing!

Every day is a new adventure.
Every day is a new adventure.  Tomorrow, though, I’m hoping for one without clubs